


But It's Better If You Do

by SweetHero



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Cabarets, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-29
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-09 09:07:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16446917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetHero/pseuds/SweetHero
Summary: Based on the music video for Panic! at the Disco’s song But It’s Better If You Do. Kuroo has been keeping secrets on where he’s been going every night, and Tsukishima is afraid he might be cheating.





	But It's Better If You Do

The lock clicked behind him at Tsukishima shut the door to the dark apartment. He sighed, frustrated, thinking he should be used to his boyfriend’s habits after nearly a month of the same routine. Darkness from the kitchen meant that Kuroo was not home; if he was, he would have left a light on so Tsukishima could see and maneuver around without waking the older man. It was a habit the two of them had gotten into after four months of living together when Tsukishima was accepted into the same college that Kuroo attended in Tokyo. The two had been dating for quite awhile, and it seemed logical to share the space since Tsukishima had not gotten one of the dorms on campus. Kuroo’s old roommates, Bokuto and Akaashi, had moved out and gotten a place of their own once Kuroo mentioned that Tsukishima had decided to attend the same university.

Now, however, made six days in a row that Tsukishima had come home to an empty apartment, and he was growing more annoyed each night. Kuroo always avoided the subject whenever it was brought up, and Tsukishima was beginning to get suspicious about the true nature of his boyfriend’s nightly excursions.

He climbed into the king-sized bed and opened his  _ Ethics in Law _ textbook for the final class required by his major, hoping to squeeze in a little reading before his eyes decided to betray him and force him to sleep. He had successfully read eleven pages before he heard the telltale scrape of a key in the door that signalled Kuroo’s return, and he turned on his phone briefly to look at the time. Two twenty-three in the morning. Tsukishima internally cursed both his classes for only being available in the evenings and his boyfriend for, well, whatever it was that he was doing each night.

“Mmm, good morning babe,” Kuroo slurred as he entered the bedroom, voice thick with exhaustion but a pleasant smile on his face. He crossed over to where Tsukishima sat and layed down next to him, wrapping his arms around the blond’s torso. “What’re you reading?”

Tsukishima huffed, the added weight making it difficult to turn the page without elbowing Kuroo directly in the nose. “Stuff for my law class. And it’s hardly morning. We haven’t slept yet.”

Kuroo pressed his face into the crook of Tsukishima’s arm, sighing contently. “You know ‘m proud of you, right?”

“Yes, Tetsu, I know.” Tsukishima couldn’t help the fondness that filled his chest before he remembered that he was supposed to be annoyed. “You tell me that every day, and I appreciate it. But you gotta get off me. You smell like alcohol and I’m tired. Were you out with your friends again?”

“Come on, Kei,” Kuroo muttered, sitting up. “I told you, I’m not going out. I got a second job so I can pay for this place until you finish your last semester and get a job of your own.”

That was the first thing that made Tsukishima suspicious. Kuroo came back every night smelling of booze and acting tipsy, though he said that was because he was more of a morning person and didn’t like staying up so late. As for the smell, he seemed to always focus on something else like he was pretending not to have heard Tsukishima.

Tsukishima made a noise low in his throat that resembled something of uncertainty and disbelief.

“You don’t believe me, do you.” Kuroo said. It wasn’t a question.

“Look, Tetsu. I have no reason not to believe you. It just seems weird that you don’t want to tell me. That’s all.” Tsukishima was proud of the way his voice didn’t waver.

“Babe, I…” Kuroo began, but he was cut off when Tsukishima scoffed in response.

“I’m not mad at you,” he lied reassuringly. “Just tired right now. Go take a shower, I’m going to sleep.” He put the textbook down and removed his glasses, obliging Kuroo with a quick goodnight kiss, then rolling over so he could pretend to be asleep.

The weight on the other side of the bed lifted, the sound of shuffling socks on the carpet disappeared behind the bathroom door, and the shower turned on. Still, Tsukishima remained stationary until he was certain Kuroo had gotten in the shower before pulling out his phone and texting his best friend.

 

**To: Yamaguchi [2:37]**

It just doesn’t make any sense.

 

Yamaguchi, ever the night owl, replied almost immediately.

 

**From: Yamaguchi [2:37]**

There must be a logical explanation…

 

When Tsukishima didn’t respond for a few minutes, Yamaguchi sent another text.

 

**From: Yamaguchi [2:41]**

You haven’t seen the way he looks at you when you’re not paying attention.

Just the other week when you came back for Aki’s birthday, he was looking at you like you hung the moon.

 

**From: Yamaguchi [2:43]**

Believe me, he’s not cheating on you.

 

Tsukishima was not completely reassured, but he was always thankful for his best friend’s rational personality.

 

**To: Yamaguchi [2:44]**

Thank you Yamaguchi

**From: Yamaguchi [2:45]**

Anytime Tsukki :)

 

He heard the water shut off in the bathroom, so he quickly checked to make sure his alarm was set and rolled over in an attempt to fall asleep, or at least appear to be.

 

* * *

  
  


A few more days passed before Tsukishima brought it up again, this time over breakfast. He hated when Kuroo was upset with him, and they tried to never go to bed angry with each other. It made it that much easier to not talk about it when Tsukishima felt like Kuroo was intentionally avoiding him, and he was pretty sure he knew why.

“Rent is due in a few days, Tetsu. You remembered, right?”

Kuroo visibly stiffened but smiled at his boyfriend all the same. “Yep, I remembered!”

“Are we going to be alright this month? We struggled a little last month, and that was before you picked up this drinking habit.” Tsukishima regretted the way those last few words came out immediately, but he stood his ground as the grin disappeared off Kuroo’s face.

“Kei, really? I don’t have a drinking habit. I don’t even like alcohol that much.”

“Then where are you going every night? You come back smelling like liquor, what am I supposed to think?”

“I’m going to work!”

“Yeah, you keep saying that. But where? Where do you work?”

“I…” Kuroo hesitated.

“Hmm.” Tsukishima sipped his coffee “Well as long as we are good on the money. I just haven’t seen paychecks come like they do for your other job, so I was concerned that they weren’t paying you on time. I’m sorry to make you have to pay for it all. I promise when I get a job of my own I’ll reimburse you.” The shift in atmosphere was sudden but pleasant.

“Ah don’t worry about it. Just focus on your degree, you’re almost done! And I set up direct deposit for my new job, so I’ll check my account balance later to make sure they’ve sent it. Plus, I’ve got some cash that I’ve been saving if we need to use that. So we’re good.”

That was the second thing Tsukishima was suspicious of. He hadn’t seen any of this money that Kuroo said he was making, cash or otherwise. He didn’t know where it came from or where it went, but he trusted his boyfriend enough to make the necessary payments, even if he needed a reminder every once in awhile.

“So, you have a break after your first class, right? Wanna meet up somewhere for lunch?”

“How can you think about lunch when we are currently eating breakfast?”

“Listen, I’ve always got time to think about food. Especially when I don’t have to cook it.”

Tsukishima smiled, momentarily forgetting the topic of the morning. “Yeah, there’s a new Thai place around the corner from the bookstore. Maybe we could check that out?”

 

* * *

 

After Kuroo left for his main job as a financial advisor at the bank in the next district over, Tsukishima set to cleaning up the dishes from breakfast. This was also part of their routine. Kuroo would wake up early to get ready and cook breakfast, and Tsukishima would clean up after Kuroo left for work. He hummed softly to himself to the tune of some catchy alt-rock song that he had heard on the radio in the student center the previous day as he scraped a few leftover egg yolks and toast crumbs into the trash.

When he opened the lid to the trash, however, he noticed a few suspicious slips of paper with writing on them that hadn’t been there the day before. He pulled one out that looked the cleanest and observed the writing when he realized it was a phone number writing hastily on a napkin. Retrieving another, he saw the same thing. This was the third and final occurrence that made Tsukishima suspicious of Kuroo. Since it obviously wasn’t his, it must have been Kuroo’s, and he had gotten them from wherever he was the previous night.

Suddenly filled with rage, Tsukishima clenched his fists around the napkins as he pulled out his phone to call his boyfriend. He was beginning to feel like he would not be using that title much longer.

Kuroo picked up after two rings, and the background noise sounded like he was waiting on the train platform.

“Hey Kei, what’s up? Everything alright? You never call.”

“Tetsurou, why are there crumpled napkins with phone numbers writing on them in the trash?”

“What? Oh, those. This group of girls came in to work last night and got pretty hammered and gave me those. They wouldn’t listen to me when I said I didn’t swing that way, so I put them in my pocket to be nice but I forgot about them until I got home.”

“Do you work at a bar or something?”

“Well, not technically, but —”

“Then where, Tetsu? Why won’t you tell me? It must be someplace racy or sketchy if there are girls getting drunk and giving you their numbers!” Tsukishima’s voice gradually raised in volume until he was yelling the last few words.

“Kei, please. I’m sorry, they don’t mean anything to me! You know you’re the only one I love, right? Kei?”

Tsukishima was so furious that he didn’t even respond, but he didn’t hang up either.

“I’m serious, they didn’t mean anything. I didn’t know those napkins would bother you so much, or I would’ve thrown them away before I got home.”

“Oh, so you would be keeping secrets from me? Why are you lying to me, Tetsu?”

“I promise I’m not lying! I love you, I wouldn’t do anything like that. I didn’t mean to suggest that I’d keep secrets from you.”

“But you did, and you are. I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

“Kei, I’m sorry —” But Tsukishima had hung up. He set his phone face down on the counter and returned to the dishes in front of him, trying to calm his on-edge temper. But his phone vibrated rapidly, signaling a call, undoubtedly from Kuroo. Tsukishima ignored it. It vibrated once more as he received a text, but he ignored that as well. When it vibrated a third time, he was tempted to smash the plate he was holding but convinced himself not to as he would then have to deal with broken glass.

As calmly as he could, he dried his hands off and turned his phone over to view the home screen. Two texts and a missed call appeared under the name Kuroo had saved in his phone and he had claimed he was too lazy to change.

 

**From: ~Tetsu the Tiger~ <3 [9:59]**

Are you mad at me?

Kei?

 

Tsukishima resisted the urge to throw his phone out the kitchen window.

 

* * *

 

_ “Come on, man. It’ll be fun! Gonna help you take your mind off that douchebag boy toy of yours.” _

“Ugh,” Tsukishima glowered as he flashed his ID before being pushed roughly into the club. “Why did I agree to this? I hate clubs.”

“Oh but this is no ordinary club,” his friend from his elective Japanese class stated. “This is different, much more your style.”

Tsukishima sighed but allowed himself to be pulled along despite the strong feeling in his gut that begged him to leave immediately. The club was named something forgettable, like  _ Discotheque _ or whatever, which helped conceal its true nature according to one of the guys in the group. That only confused and concerned Tsukishima even more.

He was alarmed when the man at the door handed him a white mask that covered the upper half of his face and most of his hair, instructing him to put it on before entering the main floor area. Seeing his companions don the masks they were given, Tsukishima relented and slipped his on over his head, annoyed when he had to remove his glasses as they would neither fit over nor under the mask. He scoffed at the poor design and disconsideration of the visually impaired.

The room was lit softly, which already made it difficult to see, and crowded enough that Tsukishima lost his friend and the rest of the groups almost immediately. He noted the lack of loud, thumping EDM music that normally accompanied nightclubs and how it was replaced by live performers, also wearing masks. When he looked at the stage, he was surprised to see the strange ensemble of people that comprised the performing company.

There was an odd selection of instruments and singers, but what startled Tsukishima the most was the arrival of multiple strippers, both male and female. They all wore matching red and black cloaks and lingerie that they used in their performance, stripteasing suggestively and swinging their hips in time with the music. Tsukishima felt like he was transported into 1920s America with the way the performers were dressed and the jazzy, swing style of music they played.

Though entranced for the duration of one song, Tsukishima soon found himself bored and uncomfortably hot being surrounded by so many people. He couldn’t see well enough to thoroughly enjoy the dancers, and he didn’t care much for the music. He pushed through the crowd to make his way to the bathrooms in the back, hoping to get away from the discomfort.

Just as he opened the door to the men’s restroom, someone else was leaving and they collided forcefully. Surprised, Tsukishima fell to the ground hard enough that it knocked his mask askew. From the groaning sound that the other man made, Tsukishima could guess that he suffered a similar fate. He reached for the glasses in his pocket and put them on, making sure they didn’t break or bend in the fall.

Looking up, Tsukishima noticed that the other man had not fallen down, but his mask was also slightly removed. He had on the same red and black outfit that the dancers wore. His head was down and he had a hand over his face; it was likely that Tsukishima had accidentally headbutted him in the nose. Still, he peeked through his fingers and offered a hand to Tsukishima who was still on the ground.

“Sorry,” Tsukishima muttered gruffly as he took hold of the man’s hand to help himself off the floor. “I didn’t see you. You alright?”

“Yeah, ‘m fine. You?”

Tsukishima made a noncommittal noise of affirmation as he looked at the other man, who had just raised his head to look Tsukishima in the eye.

With their masks askew, the two men could clearly see each other. It only took a heartbeat for them to determine the other’s identity.

“Kei?”  
“Tetsu?”

“What the hell?”  
“What are you doing here?”

“I… well, I work here?”

Tsukishima’s jaw dropped. “This is what you haven’t been telling me about for the past month?”

Kuroo’s face flushed, and Tsukishima would be lying if he said it wasn’t a little cute. “Uh, yeah? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep it a secret. It was embarrassing! I didn’t know what you would think, and every time you brought it up I would freeze, and—”

Tsukishima shut him up the only way he knew how. He pulled Kuroo in and kissed him hard and needy, a way that they hadn’t kissed in a long time. He could feel the tension drain from his boyfriend’s shoulders when he wrapped his arms around Kuroo’s neck and leaned further into the kiss.

They broke apart, hot and gasping for air, and Tsukishima used the silence between them to say, “I’m still mad at you, but at least I know you aren’t cheating on me. Directly anyway.”

Kuroo’s content expression dropped immediately. “Wait, you thought I was cheating on you? Kei, I would never do that!”

Tsukishima stifled a giggle. The whole situation seemed silly now that he knew what was really going on. “Funny, Yamaguchi said the same thing.”

Kuroo paled, the blush that once flushed his face disappearing rapidly. “What did he tell you?”

Tsukishima smirked but said nothing.

“Kei, no. What did he say? Kei?”

Laughing, Tsukishima tugged on Kuroo’s arm to pull him out of the bathroom entryway that they hadn’t moved from. He went for another kiss, but Kuroo pulled back.

“Sorry, babe. I’ve gotta get back to work. But you should come backstage with me. I could give you a private viewing,” Kuroo finished with a wink and a seductive roll of his hips. He adjusted his mask so it hid his face once again.

Tsukishima grinned and followed Kuroo through a door that led to a staircase up to the stage, and he gripped onto his boyfriend’s hand until the very last moment before Kuroo had to return to the stage. From the angle Tsukishima sat to the stage, he could see his boyfriend’s profile perfectly. Every flourish of the silk cloak, every sway of his hips, every teasing wink and grin he sent to the audience, Tsukishima could see clearly. He could pretend they were each meant for him, only him; the patrons in the audience didn’t know who was behind the mask, and they certainly wouldn’t be leaving with him at the end of the night.

He grinned wickedly at the thought.

Kuroo’s dancing enthralled him, every little move and step drawing Tsukishima’s attention more. Before he realized he was moving, he had left his seat and crept closer to the curtain, remaining out of sight of the crowd but yearning to get closer to his boyfriend. He wanted to touch Kuroo, wanted to feel the muscles of his thighs and hips as he rolled them back and forth, wanted to taste the sweat glistening on his upper lip, wanted to run his fingers through his hair and the silky texture of the leotard, wanted to—

But then the song was over and Tsukishima realized his mouth was hanging open. He gulped down a breath shakily, wondering vaguely if he had remembered to breathe or blink through the entire performance. Kuroo sauntered over to where he stood against the wall, grinning sweetly and eyebrows asking all the questions his mouth never would.

“That was…” Tsukishima started, unsure how to continue.

“Go on,” Kuroo prompted.

In lieu of an answer, Tsukishima immediately closed the distance between him and Kuroo and kissed him like there was no one else around. And, hidden in the cover of shadows, no one would have seen them anyway.

When they finally pulled apart, Tsukishima refused to let go of the collar of Kuroo’s cloak. “You’re the literal worst. You’ve had me on edge for this whole month and when I finally find out what it’s about you do this?”

Kuroo shrugged his shoulders, but his expression gave his true feelings away. “Oh, you loved it. I’ve been practicing, you know.” He leaned closer until Tsukishima could feel his warm breath on his ear. “I’d love to try it out on you sometime, Kei.”

Tsukishima jumped back, face flushed. He hoped most of his embarrassment was concealed by the mask.

The two of them walked back out to the main floor, making casual conversation about who Tsukishima came here with. As soon as the question left Kuroo’s mouth, the group that had brought him here suddenly reappeared.

“Hey, Tsukishima!” one of them called out, oblivious to the anonymous nature of the cabaret. “Find yourself a new hookup?”

Tsukishima responded by raising his middle finger. Kuroo barked out a laugh.

“We were just about to head out, you coming?”

Before Tsukishima could answer, a loud commotion sounded from the front entrance. Five officers in uniform burst through the door, shoving everyone back.

“We have been notified that this establishment has been admitting minors, so if everyone would please remain calm we will be conducting an orderly search—”

Instead of remaining calm, many patrons began to yell back or push forward in an attempt to leave. Soon, chaos erupted as more officers showed up and a barricade of patrons was formed to prevent them from entering.

“Come on,” Kuroo muttered in Tsukishima’s ear before dragging him back through the door that led to backstage. Instead of going up the staircase this time, they went down a different set of stairs that ended outside in a back alley. Sirens and lights whirled from their right, so Kuroo tugged on Tsukishima’s arm to guide him to the left, taking off running.

“Well that’s certainly an interesting way to end a night,” Tsukishima grumbled, still being dragged by the wrist.

“Ah, there’s the snark I missed so dearly,” Kuroo noted fondly. “You haven’t been yourself lately.” The couple zigzagged through side streets and narrow pathways between buildings until they exited on the side of a busier road a few blocks from the cabaret.

“Wow, can’t imagine as to why,” Tsukishima retorted, but there was no venom in his voice. He missed their playful banter, the easiness that came with their relationship.

As they slowed to a walk, Kuroo let go of his boyfriend’s wrist and instead laced their fingers together. He brought their hands up to his mouth before planting a soft kiss to the back of Tsukishima’s palm, muttering “I love you, Kei” against his skin.

Tsukishima smiled, truly happy once again. “I love you too, Tetsurou.”

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this instead of my religion essay whoops  
> Huge headcanon that Tsukishima would be totally jealous and possessive, but he would never admit to being so. Also that Kuroo is a total flirt and would make Tsukki jealous all the time to tease him, but he didn’t do it on purpose this time.


End file.
